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UnintentionalIt was unintentional.
I really didn't mean to fall in love, I promise you. All of your insecurities called out to me, and I couldn't help but covet the your silhouette, the outline of your physique. With your dark eyes and knowing smile, even if it was indeed so brief.
But my pride has always been in my way. And as much as I long to reach out to you, I know I can't. Why should I bother you with my petty ideas, my thoughts? You have so much potential waiting to blossom, while I'm afraid of this. These feelings, these thoughts. I have so much I want to accomplish, yet why is it that I always think of you? I'll never be free as long as I wait for you, as long as I watch you.
And I'm sorry.
"I will always, always love you." Dark hair, messy hair. Dark eyes. A man just like any other...but yet all the other. And as much as I suffered, drawing back from all the memories and all the pain I fell into his love instead.
Falling, he caught me easily. Pulling me up into his embrace and filling my
Part of MeDrowning.
That's the feeling I tend to get sometimes as I drift along throughout the days, my life. I feel consistently busy as I walk through my week, and I find myself often gazing toward the sky as I watch the space of it, so open and wide. Walking to and from work, going to classes and my martial arts, doing errands and the like.
"He's still coming," I whisper sometimes, my thoughts turning in tune with the words that flow from the radio, my mouth mimicking the voice that penetrates through my core. "Waiting, waiting for Superman..."
But though I want to believe in him, I just can't. The prospect of a soul-mate or an individual meant just for me; that's silly. When I was younger I believed in true love, but now at twenty years of age I just don't. I can't believe in him, because if I do that would mean placing all my hope and trust in a person that I'm not even guaranteed exists. An unknown male looming before me is too much, and so I could never conform my pride or the core of my
AngelI can't breathe when I glance at him.
The way he smiles, slowly, the corners of his mouth pulling up to reveal ivory-white almost stops me. The way his black hair falls over his shoulders as he leans toward me, his gray eyes glowing. And as he bends down to press his forehead against mine, his hands wrap around my self. Pulling me close, I can feel the rhythm of ours hearts beat in unison and I shake, my thoughts stumbling over each other.
"Why don't you let go of that fear?" he murmurs quietly.
Why, indeed, I muse silently. I glance up back into his eyes, loving the way he reflects everything he is inside. Those two stormy eyes I knew so well, ever since he had sacrificed it all for me. "I'm afraid," I admit. He nods, chuckling quietly. So well did he know me that those two words told him all.
I didn't deserve him, or anyone, for that matter. My only purpose was to serve others, not to chase after any whimsical dreams. I would let it all go if only to grasp the hand of anyone, to save
Safe and SoundShe was a kind soul.
She was small, petite. With huge brown eyes and even darker hair often mistaken for black she stood there, not quite five feet, in the midst of the cafeteria style restaurant. Her uniform was blue with the sweat of her heart, her slacks an ebony color, as were her slip-resistant shoes. And her clients loved her, loved the sight she made against the backdrop of the rustiness of the restaurant.
The way she smiled when she would glance at you, the crinkled corners of her eyes, and the sweet smile that would often play on the surface of her emotions. And yet at times she seemed to gather an expression of sorrow, and her complexion would take on a deep sadness, as if reminiscing the depths of some faraway past. But that image would disappear immediately, for she was not one to give into things so easily.
And it was on a certain morning in the month of September, as she moved around her tables, walking with a certain purpose, her hair gathered behind her in a thick braid
Heartbeat"Calm down," he whispered, his gray eyes bright.
I sighed and leaned back, glancing into the beauty of his eyes. What was I to do? Part of me was humming to run away, and yet I certainly wasn't ready. My soul and body had always belonged to my family and my God, and this new-found attention was something new, alien. My heart beating, he picked me up. And I didn't feel crushed, or drowned; just loved. Love at its purest, I smiled and buried my face in his chest, breathing in the delicious scents of his soul.
He chuckled easily. The length of his hair fell like waves over my skin, and I watched as his iris' expanded, glowed, and then seemed to penetrate my being. He knew me so well, it frightened me. "What do you see?" I whispered.
He blinked, then a slow smile overcame his features. He gently put me down and studied me, and I felt at ease. I didn't ask again; I waited for his answer, breathless. And I never forgot what he said to me, though I certainly saw it coming, "You're such a d
ReleaseI was entirely wasted.
The drag of the cigarette and the smoke felt foreign after the taste of alcohol in my life, the two flavors mixing and creating an almost bitter taste. But the smallness of it, the breath, the lighted end of it flicking at the corners of my vision felt familiar, felt good.
And yet I felt so damn stupid. Stupid for ever believing, for ever holding onto the ridiculous notion that she would ever be mine.
How I could have believed it? From the moment it all began, the intensity of her brown eyes boring into my very soul as I had glanced her, the loveliness of her darkened skin, the warmth of her body. It had all drew me in, her pureness, her innocence. And when all I had wanted was to bury myself in her, to taint her white a wicked shade of red all I could do was breathe, take a step back, and indulge in my pleasures.
With her in my mind.
The course that her red blood followed throughout her body, the beating, hotness of it unleashed at some point in the corners of m
Drowning in this AddicitonI tried to drown out your voice
Inside the lies, I made my choice
With my lips against the bottle
I tried to swallow the memories
I put the speed of my destruction
In complete full throttle
I brought this about, a self induction
Laying here drowning in my worries.
Just laying here in my corruption.
I could whisper to you my series of sorrows,
Instead I'll just lay here in my low,
Or I could borrow another bottle
Of sweet nectar and fire
As my blood acquires
The song of a liar.
Brittle and bare,
Lay me to rest on the wave
Aware I am this may be my early grave
with a kiss to my Jackie D.
Like a whisper to the noose waiting
For me under the elm tree
as I am aching for another bottle
Of sweet nectar and fire
As I try to rejoice
I think I finally have forgotten your voice.
chasing uphill warsover time we have - overthrown time
and in becoming its ruler can see
of dark clouds above the delta
skies aurum and gun-metal gray
in the demonstrable distance
and sights of dis-in-teg-ra-tion
are felt savagely slowing
their innocuous prey
senescence will plan her revenge
like an animal held
out over a ledge by its ankles
for a taste of its own skin
GlowEach day marks the breath of another World,
the workings of a long lost God.
Darkness covers the face of the deep,
a feeble attempt to cover up the void,
the unfurling chaos
of want and tapestry,
where your face should be.
And with every morning there comes a dawn,
but before the dawn the candles sing!
A flame sings out in the darkness;
a swan song for the new Creation.
And I watch like a suckled babe
as the darkness cowers away,
her memory bathed in the sultry red,
and I close my eyes as the wax yields her scent.
The world was named as good, and all within it;
yes, the world is my mistress –
a fair lady girt in finest silk,
and Earth, our Goddess, sings for me.
Yet all this I would trade,
all this I would offer up on the moon-soaked altar
beneath the star-lit shrine,
that when next the world is made anew and my candles sing their song,
that the pocket left in the glow, that shadow moribund,
should be filled with the brightest of all lights
would that it could be your face that s
life in the exospherethere's a plague upon the cattle
but they can see
well beyond hermetically sealed skies
above savagely conquered revenge
tinctures of light and darkness
on the warm midnight horizon
where many things are learned
and many things are lost
chasing worms uphill and being
consumed by their debris
know heretofore as
a temporal causality
A walkno wings no fire
a blue song for you to smile at
and the abyssal space for you in my chest
all we need - a walk
Blank. I don't remember how long it's been,
Since I stepped inside the room.
My mind is blank.
I don't know what i'm doing,
As the cold water drips down my bare back.
Trailing over old scars and new,
Sending a shiver down my back.
My mind is blank.
Indecisive, I sit upon the floor,
Staring towards the tiled wall in front of me.
What am I doing?
Where am I?
Am I even trying? It wouldn't matter anyway.
But that was the question, what am I even trying to do?
I am blank.
Particles rearrange, and the water grows warmer,
And for a small second it traces along the scars, leaving a stinging sensation,
on it's gravity maneuvered journey to the ground.
But once it hits
visigothsin the hyperbolic ether
we've a history of failing at history
our thoughts through the eyes
of discontent fish and dreamnt beasts
neon fresh from a mongrel's ripe nightmare
this interstice world discovered
made ingenious by sleep
and the beacons it keeps [in]
...the laboratory skies screaming circles
poor directionsit's a drug
addicts so high
waking each day
crawling for miles
for a drop on their tongues
a sweet sound in their ears
a tainted air in their lungs
retreat to faith
when you run out
let's be brutally honest
it's another excuse
a desperate delusion
you've lost your reason
you've lost your dreams
you've lost your way
are you so empty?
are you so blind?
are you so weak?
with a promise of forgiveness
you can be as immoral as you need
it's okay to rape and to kill, God'll forgive
are you out of your fucking mind?
you're excused for crimes
because you prayed tonight?
how do you live in these lies?
has your need for answers
led you completely astray?
ReminiscenceIt hurt me to see the depth
of those ivory, gleaming eyes.
Their passion gone, their once-love faded
deep in this redolent reminiscence.
Endless it may be, you say to the heavens,
but to me you were fulfilled, completed.
You shattered my heart to the ground
I loved you all the more.
You trampled on my darkened soul,
ripped my wings from head to toe,
you destroyed my living, breathing core,
and yet I loved you all the more.
I love you all the more.
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More